Starting

[carly_kai]

I wish I had started this blog a few months ago - back before I took that first dose of estrogen. Okay, to be totally honest I wish that I had started this journal when I first realized that something was terribly wrong with my life...

Oh yeah... I wish that I had all of the thoughts safely transcribed so that I could look back and see where I was, or perhaps more to the point, where my head was. I wish I had a day by day record of what I was thinking, how I felt and what I thought the possible outcomes in my life were.

I can't reverse time and I can't take that first pill back. I can't go back to who I was and I'm not who I will be - I'm in limbo, my very own personal gender hell. I guess I'm a work in progress...

Carly